Who Wants to Play Euchre??

Euchre...the game that has been played by legions of avid card players.  The game that generated two most often asked questions:  "What's trump?" and "What was lead?".  The game that has made husbands and wives bicker.  The game that ended friendships.  The game that is oh so totally awesome!!

If you have no idea what I am talking about, then leave now because the following post will mean absolutely nothing to you.  But if you have ever participated in the game, then read on.  You may even learn a thing or three.  Who knows...you may even pick up the cards tonight and play a game or two!!

For anyone that has played the game, you know the drill: each player is dealt five cards.  Four cards remain in the kitty, the widow, or whatever colorful name you have for it.  The player to the left of the dealer decides if the turned-up suit in the widow is trump.  Each player can pass or order the suit as trump.  The dealer has the option to pick up that suit or turn it over.  Once the card is turned down, then the rest of the players can call trump with the remaining three suits.  The dealer can also call trump.  In some variations, say Stick the Dealer, the dealer has to call trump.  Once trump has been called, the game is underway.  For example:  if Hearts were called, the Jack of Hearts is the right bauer (or is it bar??!!)  and the Jack of Diamonds is the left baur (bar, anyone?)  The player to the left of the dealer leads off a suit.  The rest of the players have to follow that suit.  If they can't follow suit, then they can play trump or throw off.  If the team makes 3 tricks, then they earn one point.  If all five tricks are taken, then they earn two points.  If a team member goes alone, four points.  If the team calls trump and scores fewer then three tricks, they are set or Euchred and the opposing team makes two points.  The first team to reach ten points wins the game.  One variation of the game my family plays is No Trump.  Once the dealer turns over the top card in the widow, the person to the left of the dealer can call No Trump.  All it means is there is no trump, the jacks are no longer baurs (or is it called bars?!) and high card of the suit played takes the trick.  It's wonderful when you have aces in you hand.

Personally, I have played Euchre since my college days.  Even now I can recall years of watching my parents and grandparents play Euchre.  Christmas, Thanksgiving, and Easter were all holidays that was breeding grounds for a friendly game.  I can still see my parents and grandparents huddled around the table, with occasional groaning or laughter depending on what happened in the game.  I was very fortunate to have learned to play the game from my Dad, Mom, and my Grandma (Ma).  Ma was a card shark from way back in the day.  She was at her happiest when she was playing Bridge with her friends or playing Euchre with her loved ones.

When I first met Paula, she had no idea how to play the game.  She jokes that be to a part of the Hoff family, she had to learn how to play.  On a long drive home from a friend's house, I ran down the basics of Euchre with her.  Paula had played other card games before, so she was very familiar with the suits.  Like all other first time Euchre players, the left and right bauer (or is it bar??) threw her off.  That next day, I told Ma that Paula wanted to learn how to play Euchre and she immediately grabbed a deck of cards and soon Paula was playing like a pro!  For those early first games of Euchre, Ma took Paula under her wing and the ladies usually played against my Dad and me for "funsies".  Paula was a very quick study and she soon developed her own strategy for playing.  I can tell you from experience that Paula is a very formidable opponent!

My Dad is a marvel himself when it comes to playing this game.  He has a reputation of having very little in his hand and going alone on virtually nothing.....and making it!  He had watched some guys at his job play on their lunch hour.  He had recently shared with me that when he and my Mom were dating, on Friday nights they would go to a West Carrollton football game and afterward would head over to Mary and Bob Brown's house for some Euchre.  My Mom was relatively new to the game and Mary was an excellent player.  Mary Brown (whose homemade ham salad still lingers fondly in my Dad's memory) was responsible for uttering some classic lines such as this gem:  "This hand wouldn't drag a sick whore outta bed!"  My Dad is responsible for his own classic lines regarding Euchre.  Anyone who is privileged to have had played with him has heard these beauties:

• "That's why these cards have backs on them!"
• "Someone seriously overlooked their hand!"
• "Lead 'em like you gotta 'em."
• "The ducks are on the pond."
• "We got eleven cards to make a point."
• "The card laid is the card played."
• "Everyone gets something when Bob deals."
• "Don't send no boy!!"
• "You think long, you think wrong!"  (my personal favorite!!)

Anytime Dad and I play Euchre with friends, I encourage Dad to tell his famous table-talk story.  Now, I can in no way do this story justice, but I will do my best.  Years ago, Dad and Mom were playing a card game called "500".  Some folks call it Bid Euchre.  This game mirrors Euchre with the trump, but it has a joker that reigns over the right bauer (or is it bar??) and six people can play.  The suits have point values and teams outbid each other to get the cards in the widow.  Anyway, Dad had lead suit and my Mom was on the horns of a dilemma of whether or not to trump his lead.  Mom's partner, who sat a few chairs down, had a card in her hand and was tapping the table with said card. She shook her head no, signaling she had the ace of that suit.  When Mom's teammate was chastised by her husband, she asked "What did I do??"  Dad admits that it wasn't funny then,  but we all burst into gales of laughter when he tells the story now!

My Mom (may she rest in peace) has gone down in the annals of Hoff history herself when it comes to this game.  One night, my Mom, Dad, Paula and I were playing an especially spirited game of Euchre.  My Mom had gotten frustrated with my Dad over something, which I don't remember now.  Mom executed what is now known as "The Double Booger Flipper."  She inserted the middle fingers into both her nostrils and flew them at my Dad.  We all about fell off our chairs screaming with laughter!  I will cherish that memory for a long, long time!!

These days, Paula and I get our Euchre fix by playing with Dad and my step-mom Nancy.  Nancy's stock phrase is "Deal me a loner, sweetheart."  This sweet lady is always ready to karate chop Dad and me when we call trump, usually because she wanted to call something else trump and we ruined it for her.  Nancy and I joke that we both have a penchant for turning up nines and tens.  If a couple of rounds go by without turning up either card during a deal, we both start to worry!  If Dad and I are on a winning streak, the ladies threaten us that they will go shopping.  One night the cards were so pitiful that Dad and I threatened to go shopping!!

Before I leave you all, I wanted to give shout out to my pal Joshua; my brother from another mother.  He's got his own blog going and I invite you all to show his some love.  Hop on over to http://www.jaarka.me/ and check it out!

Take care guys and remember life is too short to drink bad coffee!!